Mean Girls

As your kids grow up, you realize that somethings stay the same.  There will always be those certain jocks that seem to have it all.  There's those cheerleaders that will do anything to have others like them.  The weird ones that you kinda' ignore because you don't really know what to make of them. The kids that seem only to have the color black in their closet and try to sound very deep but end up sounding stupid.  (okay, maybe that was only in the 90's!)  And, of course, there are the mean girls.  I am not saying that guys cannot be mean, but girls - they can take it to another level.

 As a mom with boys and a girl, I am thankful that I only have to go through this once! You guys that have multiple girls, God must have knew you could handle it! :)  The momma bear in me comes out and I am not very nice. The first mean girl for Faith was in elementary school and was actually a school counselors daughter.  Ironic, huh?  Too bad the mother's empathy did not get taught to her children.

Junior high there is another one, of course.  I am sure that her mom has no idea as well.  Which is sad.  If my kids ever do anything like this, I would like to know.  It will be taken care of.  My boys are bigger than me now and 18 and older, but it would still be taken care of.  My daughter's social life would be ending.   There is no reason to treat others disrespectfully.  I know this girl is very insecure and this is her way of making herself feel better.  She has to put my daughter down to build herself up.  Jealousy comes in many forms and this is one of them.  At first, it really hurt Faith.  She cried many tears over this "friend."  Faith tried to change herself so this girl would accept her.  She tried to do the rules this "friend" made up.  Yeah, Faith jumped through many hoops trying to save this friendship until she realized that no matter what she did - it would still not be good enough.  That was a good day.  She just walked away.  I know that it still bother's her but I don't believe it hurts her anymore.  I know that in time, others will be able to see what kind of person she really is and decide it's not worth it too.

Instead, we are focusing of the real friends in her life.  The ones that will be there through the ups and down that are coming in high school.  The friends that want what's best for each other.  That are happy when you succeed.  That will give you a hard time when you need it.   That will be there when you need to talk.  The friendships we all need in life.  The blessings God gives us to help us make it.

"Blowing out someone else's candle, doesn't make yours shine any brighter."

"People who are not happy with themselves, cannot possibly be happy with you."

About Perspective...

It's all about perspective...

I'm learning that lately.  Your perspective can change your attitude for the better or worse.  It can make your day longer than it needs to be.  For example, I hate going grocery shopping.  Seriously, I've even waited until we even ate most of our canned good.  Fridge was empty besides condiments.  Yeah, it was bad!  Dinners were let me say... creative! :D  Yet, God can change my perspective.  After a tight week here and there, I leave the grocery store thanking God for the food He has provided. Amazing difference, isn't it? 

Even my home is still not finished after 2 years.  Yes, I'd love to get new floors or have my bathrooms completely finished.  (our home is a fixer upper!)  Yet, I thank God every night for the gift of a home for my family.  I know what it is like to be in between places to live.  I know what it is like to move your family and while moving in, they reality company tell you that you can't move in.  (and you already gave up your lease on the other place)  So, I honestly don't take my home for granted.  I thank God every night for a home to raise my children in.  It is all about perspective.

It gets harder when cancer is involved though.  I really hate that word.  Let me tell you this love story.  It is Valentine's Day after all.  Susie and Randy were high school sweethearts.  Their families even went to the same church.  His father was a pastor.  Then life happens...They both ended up married to others with kids.  But the story does not end there!  They found each other once again!  Both no longer married.  And true love which never died was still there.  Their love for each other was evident for everyone to see.  Cancer came and took Randy just a day ago.  My heart aches for Susie.  He was only 52.  Selfishly I do wish this story had another ending.  But, I know that the only way God could heal Randy was to take him Home.  Their faith is strong.  If your perspective was of the world, the pain would be too much to go on.  To finally have your love with you, just to lose him too soon.  Yet, with God in the picture, our perspective changes to one of celebration and hope.  He is healed and whole once again and I will join him again! Amazing what God can do, isn't it?

I would really like to say my perspective is like this all the time.  But...it's not.  I'll still complain because the bathroom isn't done yet or kids won't help with the laundry without being told to do it NOW (not in a minute).  But, I have curved a few of my perspectives towards those of gratitude.  I am trying this year to keep my perspective toward Christ.  Thankfulness is a wonderful thing.

What perspectives need an adjustment in your life?

The Odd Duckling

"This world is not my home, I'm just a passing through

My treasures are laid up, somewhere beyond the blue

The angels beckon me from Heaven's open door

And I can't feel at home in this world anymore"

Remember that old hymn?  That song has been in the back of my mind the past few weeks.  I find it popping in my head at various times on different days. Someday are worse than others....but I just feel so out of place.

Yep, that's me in the middle of all the white swans. Everyone has their own paths with ups and downs.  Each road has its own struggles.  Yet, most of the time, I feel like the odd one out there.  In a world of  bi-weekly pedicures, shopping, and nice dinners out like it's nothing unusual. That is not me.  It's not where I'm at.  My toes get chipped, I think that I really need to paint my toes.  Sometimes it gets done -- but then days become weeks while just doing life and I look down at my toes at night and think....I really need to paint my toes. And the cycle continues until a week or two later, I finally get it done! :) 

Even my daughter is going through this right now.  She is now 12.  Her favorite day of the week is Wednesday because of small groups.  She loves to play soccer.  Her clothes everyday of the school year is either jeans or yoga pants with a t-shirt.  Usually with her hair pulled back in a ponytail.  While I very thankful that she doesn't spend 30 minutes to an hour getting ready every morning, I would like her hair down once in a while.  :/  Anyway, if you remember this age, the boy craziness is starting. Several of her friends are already there. Luckily we have by passed this so far.  I'll take the grace that God has given me!  :)  Having two older brothers that can be nasty and disgusting I'm sure helps by showing boys in a different light. haha!!  getting sidetracked.... But she is the odd one.  There are no boyfriend stories for her.  No trying to look nice to empress a boy.  Just Faith being Faith.  Which is all I could ask for.

The picture I like to take :)  Such a pretty girl

Then there is the true picture :D

But God created us to be different.  We are called to be like Christ. Ephesians 4:24  "and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness."   That's a lot to live up to. Christ was not accepted and loved by all.  He did not just go with the crowd.  He was the odd duckling. The were multiple times in the Bible were Jesus talked to some one people thought he shouldn't.  He didn't do what others told Him was right.

It can be hard to be different.  We all are actively seeking acceptance, whether we realize it or not.  Have you ever thought about it like that?  You are seeking acceptance.  I am seeking it.  It just matters where you are looking for acceptance that matters.  Is it God?  Is it the world?  We are all born with a hole in our heart.  We look for things to fill it, when all along, we only needed God.  So being different, it's okay.  The acceptance of Christ is all you will ever need.


"Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."  Colossians 4:5-6

Frustration

Frustrated.

That's where I find myself.  I am an opinionated person.  I'll admit that.  However, I usually talk about it with a few people and keep it to myself around others.  I am not good at confronting my source of frustration.  I bury it until I get to this point and I want to explode.  Yes, I do know it's not the healthiest way of dealing with things.  :D

Also know that it's not the attitude that I should have.  We are supposed to be like God.  God puts up with a lot from us... from me.  Yet, He loves me through it all.  He doesn't throw up His hands with me and walk away. 

"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 

or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 

 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing,  but  rejoices with the truth. 

 Love bears all things, believes  all things, hopes all things, 

endures all things."  1 Corinthians 13:4-7

That is a lot to live up to.  Love is long suffering.  Frustration is short-tempered.  But, I am human and sometimes this world makes it hard to be here.  Sometimes people make it hard.  Sometimes I get tired of biting my tongue and going with the flow.  What am I supposed to do?  Give it all to Him. 

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly

 in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy,

 and my burden is light.”  1 Matthew 11:28-29

 So, I am trying.  Right now, honestly, I am not there yet.  I don't want to bury it until it pops back up later.  I want to let go of it.  I'll get there.  Just not today....

 "casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

The Mask of A Christian

"Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon

you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 

But rejoice insofar as you share Christ's sufferings, that you may also

rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed."   1 Peter 4:12-13

God never said that our life would be easy. He warns us that it won't be.  We were at Target and my oldest, Joey, found a t-shirt that he really wanted.  It said, "May your life be as interesting as you pretend it is on Facebook."  When did we start covering everything up?  Glossing over life so that the image looks better?

It's not real.   After all of the small talk, then what happens?   I get so tired of fake things.

My kids laugh at me because I can just get through growling at them for something and a second later, answer the phone is the most pleasant voice like everything is fine.  (they, of course, do this when my normal mood has returned! LOL)  We all do this, don't we?  Cover it up...just a little bit.

Afraid of....what?  judgement of others?  Maybe even gossip?

"My companion stretched out his hand against his friends; he violated his

 covenant.  His speech was smooth as butter, yet war was in his heart;
his words were softer than oil, yet they were drawn swords."  

Psalms 55:20-21

I believe it's okay to take down the mask.  We are all struggling just trying to make it another day.  Some are wonderful and we can feel the blessings pouring out on us.  Then, there are days that we start out with a cold because the water heater broke and end up with food poisoning from Mexican take out.  Those days where we want to throw our hands up and yell, "I can't take this anymore!!"

We all have different battles.  Some of the hard ones for me might have been easy for you.  So, instead of your judgement, I might have just needed a hug and some advice.  My promise is that I will do the same for you.  Some of your hardships might just need a different perspective.  Or, they might just need a shoulder that can handle some tears.  I can do either one.  :)  

Living behind a mask is a lonely place.  Let's set them aside and see who we really are.  The people God wanted us to be all along.   After all, He sees behind our facade all of the time....

Modesty of Girls

Last year, I wrote a post about Girls and Attention.   I should have realized then, it is just going to get harder to stay modest as they get older.  Girls my daughters age (11 yrs) wear shorts that are about the size of their panties. (notice these shorts are only about an inch from the inseam area)

And, of course, shirts that are on the tight side and some that even show their bellies.  Luckily, my daughter does not want any part of that still.  So,  what is my girl to do?  We found out that just going to pick out some new shorts or a new swimsuit means going five or six stores.  :/

Faith told me after school yesterday that a friend thought she was wearing capri's.  Why you may ask?  Because her shorts went down to her knees.  Faith had on some athletic shorts.  Her friend had on some of the shorty-shorts.  Several inches of material difference!

Swimsuit shopping was even worse.  It seems even the once piece suits want to show cleavage that the girls are developing! Of course the most popular suit, was the bikini.

Yes, this was in the little girls department.  Not the teen or women's.  Small girls wearing a string bikini!!  If a little girl is wearing strings when they are small because they think it makes them look pretty, what is she going to do when she is older to look pretty??  Where is the modesty the Bible speaks about?

Faith told me that she wanted some of the surfer board shorts this year with a swim suit top.  Sounds easier enough, right?  Nope, not really.  We did find some board shorts at the Children's Place and Old Navy.  However it's the top that is the issue.  She didn't really want a board shirt, so we were looking at the tops of bathing suits.  Mostly were stings with triangles.  Or went low in the front and showed her belly.

I just don't understand why parents want this for our girls!  If parents didn't buy it.  They would not sell it.  Yet, looking around, they are selling tons of it.  Why do you want your sweet, innocent little girl showing all of her body? I know I might sound like a prude right now.  That is the chance I am going to take.  My girl is worth SO much more.  I am so proud that she agrees with me right now.  Yes, that may change as she tries to fit in when she gets older.  I hope that she always stands on her principals....God's principles.

"Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, 

whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a

 price. So glorify God in your body."   1 Corinthians 6:19-20

"Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable
 apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold
 or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who
 profess godliness—with good works."  1 Timothy 2:9-10

A Woman's Look in the Mirror

As I look through other blogs I read, the message seems to be just accepting yourself.  Which is one of the hardest things to do ~ especially as a woman!  Compare my life to others and it seems so ... dull, maybe? boring?  I'm just a curvy (another way to put that I need to lose a few! LOL) middle age  (...oh, my gosh did I really write that?? should I erase it?? no..no, just leave it) mother of three trying to be a loving mom, aunt, friend, daughter in a world filled with anger and hate. 

I look at other mothers who seem to have it all going for them.  It's easy to start to feel hard on myself.  But there are certain things as I've gotten older that I have come to accept.  Yes, there will always be other women prettier than I am.  I will never be a Reese Witherspoon or Julia Roberts.  God only made one of them ~ just as He only made one of me.  Yes, there will always be other women who seem to have it all together.  I've learned the key word is "seem".   They are just a frazzled over a kid puking in the back of the car, as you and I would be! 

Remember that God made each of us with a plan.  All of us are not supposed to be Reese or Julia.  I am just Jen buying the movie ticket hoping that for the next hour and a half I'll forget about the laundry and dishes waiting for me when I get home from the movie.  Most of the time, I'm just 'Mom" coming home to my kids after work, helping them with homework, and cooking supper. 

And, part of my self-esteem comes with being okay with that.  Even things that I am good at, there is probably some one out there that can do better.  I am a good cook and baker, but it's not like I'm on the way to having a cooking show! ;D  I am pretty good at art, but it doesn't mean that it should be in a museum!   If I strive to improve, then I will get better.  But, if I keep striving for perfection ~  I will never be happy.

God made you with every freckle and hair counted for.  When God sees you ~ He sees His child.  He loves ever wart you ever will have.  That is what God wants for us when we look in the mirror ~ to see love.  Not wishing for perfection.  But loving His creation right now...right where you are. 

Girls And Attention

I look back when I was growing up and compare it to now. It's essentially the same. Once you get a certain age, it seems like fitting in and being like everyone else is SO important. The big difference is what is 'normal' for my daughter's age right now. Does anyone else have a 10 year old daughter out there?? Have you walked through that department? Have you seen the clothes or should I say lack of clothes?

 

I knew it would get worse. Honestly, when she was a toddler, the shorts would barely cover her diapers. So, I would buy her plain shorts in the boys section. They were seriously an inch or two longer. Now that she is bigger, the shorts still have not changed. They are still about an inch or maybe two (if your lucky) from the middle seam! Honestly, do we need to look at our kids in such a way?? Why does this have to be the 'normal' for our kids??

I'm a bit southern, redneck-ish maybe?, I don't know what you want to call me but I've always called those shorts....are you ready?....hoochie-momma' shorts. Yes, you read that right. You wonder why those shorts are the hot ticket right now? Because there are plenty of mom's out there willing to buy that half a yard of fabric for their girls. It is because there are plenty of mom's who think that it's fine.


There is a line that I am walking on right now. The line between being a prude and letting it all go. I tell you some things I'm firm on.  I don't like the short-shorts. I don't like seeing nine-year-olds running around in bikini's. (or 15-year-olds either actually) I also don't like the neck line on the one piece bathing suits either this year! I bought two on sale thinking it would be fine. When she tried them on, they made my daughter uncomfortable because it was cut so low. It only takes one or two little girls to wear it, then everyone else wants it as well. It is so hard to be the little girl who's different. I just don't understand why moms think this okay and buy it in the first place.


I like to think I'm on the line...yes, I may waiver a bit and be a bit wishy-washy on somethings because honestly ~ I don't know the answers to everything! I am learning as I go. I do know that we are all made in the likeness of Christ. I know that our bodies are temples for the Holy Ghost to reside. The age old question, "Why would Jesus do?" comes up. What would He want for our daughters?

"likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable

apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and

gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women

who profess godliness—with good works." 1 Timothy 2:9-10

"For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world
and forfeit his soul?"  Mark 8:36

Acceptance in Relationships

We are starting a new series in Sunday School about relationships. Reading through this weeks verses (Ruth) really made me think about what are we looking for in relationships. I believe that it boils down to acceptance and trust.

That is what I am looking for as I am searching. They don't have to love me or even like me really. Just accept me ~ warts and all. I don't pretend to be something that I am not. This is it. And, if we are to move past that stage of our relationship, we must have trust. We must trust one another to truly be there for one another. In those moments, in the middle of the mess of life, to have those you trust around you. Isn't that what we are looking for? And, once there is acceptance and trust ~ love for one another follows.

I was trying to find a different verse that talks about this. Most of the time John 13:34 is mentioned: "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." Which is a great verse! I just wanted to find more.

Romans 15:7 "Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed
you, for the glory of God."

Wow! If we could do that for others! Think of that for a moment. Think about that moment when we finally make it through and Christ opens His arms for you. That welcoming. There won't be any hesitation or second thoughts. That is how we should welcome others. With love in our hearts. There isn't any hidden agenda. No one is looking down upon others. Just acceptance.

John 6:37 "All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever
comes to me I will never cast out."

ALL that I am given ~ I will share. The blessings poured out to me ~ I will share. Isn't that beautiful? What a wonderful way to look at others. No one is cast out. Everyone is accepted. Each person you meet today ~ they are looking for the same things you are. It unites us. And, if Christ lives within me, if my body is the temple for God ~ am I accepting others as He would do??

Moving On Up...

Luke was so proud to be sitting on my hospital bed holding Faith for the first time. Who knew looking at that adorable three year old face what struggles would come? I know that I didn't... but God did. And when in the mists of this mess... God provides a message to keep going ~ keep trying ~ don't give up through our message at church on Sunday.

"Save me, O God! For the waters have
come up to my neck. I sink in deep mire,
where there is no foothold; I have come into deep waters, and the flood
sweeps over me. " Psalm 69:1-3

No, that is not the message of hope that we went over! LOL Yet, I understand this passage. I am sure that each of you have been there as well at some point in your lives. What do you do when the water is about to take you down? You look up! That is where my hope is. Sitting on my knees at the altar asking for God's help and direction through this ~ having two wonderful Christian women praying with me ~ that is God's hand. I know that He will see me through.

Another amazing lady told me recently that all of us are called and a few are chosen. And, you are chosen for this path. So, hand in hand with God, I walk along this path. I did send out those e-mails to the vice-principal and resource teacher. Luke's resource teacher messaged me back and said she didn't know about Friday. I didn't get a response today for the vice-principal, so I took myself up there. Mr.D is a wonderful guy and made the transition so much easier for Luke and I because he genuinely cares for the kids. BUT ~ he left me with the idea that he totally understood my position but there wasn't much he could do. He is going to speak to the teachers on how they speak to the kids. (don't tell them they got a lower score, when they already know the reward is for the kids who did good on the test. Seriously? That's the fix?) So, now to the next rung on the ladder. I have written an e-mail to the principal. I have also written the letter to the superintendent for K-7. I'll re-read them in the morning to double check them. (I catch a lot of errors that way!)

I realize that some might be thinking, "Really? Seriously? It's an ice cream cone!" But, it is more than that. It honestly boils down to discrimination towards the below average kids. It just tells the children that their effort and their hard work doesn't matter. (When I've been telling Luke since kindergarten how much it does matter!!) Luke was only 14 points from being average!! That's amazing accomplishment from the previous year! Yet, he knows that he is still not good enough to even get the reward. When you seperate the kids, the rest of the class/pod knows why they are not there. It's embarassing. Plus, they go into another room to do more work while their peers are outside visiting and eating. It is just plain wrong. There are many children that will never make that mark. They will never be 'average'. We need to celebrate their hard work and effort ... not the grade itself.

Thank you for all of your kind words. I appreciate your prayers. God gave me Luke for many reasons. I wouldn't be half the mom...woman...or Christian I am without him in my life.

Clueless Teacher. . .

There are times when things happen that you can just roll off. No biggy. Plus, it's a lot easier to let things just roll off when they happen to you. But, when people mess with my kids ~ that is a different thing all together.

Friday I was SO mad. If fact, the word 'mad' doesn't describe it. I was so angry that I knew I couldn't rationally call the school. All those words that don't come out of me ~ well, they were going through my head. I just wanted to sit these people down and YELL and SCREAM!! So, I didn't call at all. After several hours of trying to calm down and telling God how mad I was ~ I finally could calm down enough to compose a rational e-mail.

You might be wondering what in the world happened on Friday. (If your not wondering, you might just want to stop reading now!) Friday, we picked Luke up from middle school. I'm asking the usual questions about how his day was and what he had for lunch. The normal stuff. He then tells me that his pod (they separate the kids in middle school by pods) got to go outside and have ice cream. BUT, he didn't get to go. My first thought was it was because they had chocolate ice cream. (he's allergic) Nope that wasn't it. So, I asked if he got in trouble. Nope that wasn't it either.

Luke then proceeded to tell me that the ice cream was a reward for doing well on the Benchmark. And, they (some teacher I guess) told him that he didn't do good enough. So, Luke as well as a few other kids had to go to a language room and do extra work while the other kids went outside to have ice cream. I asked who else the other kids where. You want to know the kicker?? They were the kids in his resource language class last year!! These kids that didn't get to participate were resource kids with IEP's!! And some clueless teacher had the gawl to tell my child that he didn't do well enough on his Benchmark!

Just thinking about it makes my blood pressure go up. How dare she!! She has no idea how hard he tried. She has no idea how much progress he made on his benchmark. She has no idea what she did to my son and the other resource kids! I e-mailed Luke's assistant principal. I like to think that he has no idea about this. I gave him the benefit of the doubt. However, if I don't get a response on Monday that is satisfactory, I'll be up there. I don't make a lot of friends with assistant principals but that's okay. They come and they go in my life. But ~ that is my kid they are messing with.

April Showers...

We have had a wee bit of rain lately. . .

There is a normal size fence in there...

I really wish I would have gotten pictures during out flood. It was amazing how much rain we got in such a little bit of time. The places and roads just flooded with water. I did get out today with my camera and got a few. The usually dry creeks were water rapids. The little pond by our library was filled to the brim.

The water reminded me of life. How it can throw things at us we don't expect. How life happens right now ~ not some time in the future. We don't know when the floods in our life are going to happen. Those moments when you can throw you hands up and just cry, "why?" Or those times when no words will come out. The floods...

It's how we handle the floods that matter. Do we stay rigid and break and become uprooted? Will our circumstances determine us? Or are will learn to bend? There is a difference between getting knocked over and bending. Bending does not mean letting go of our beliefs or what we stand for. Bending means acceptance. Knowing deep inside that God's plan is better than our own. Allowing God, in His wisdom and love, to have His way in our life.

Notice the flowers and plants this spring...They bend as well. They are reaching towards the sun. That's where I want to be... Reaching for the Son.

"A bend in the road is not the end of the road, unless you
fail to make that turn." ~ author unknown

The Shoe Doesn't Fit

Even before you hold your precious, beautiful baby ~ there are dreams. Dreams of the future. Maybe he'll be a baseball star. Or the star quarterback. Maybe she'll become a dancer. Or a writer. As you decorate the nursery and pick out a stroller, these dreams form. What happens when the beautiful baby grows and has their own opinions and dreams? What if instead of being the quarterback, your given a boy that doesn't even like sports? Or a girl that likes to play in the mud? What happens if your faced with ADD or autism? What happens when our dreams as parents does not match our reality? Do you try to force your opinions on them? Maybe make 'suggestions' all the time, but in reality just telling what to do? Seriously, if your parents told you that your going to like it ~ do you think you would have? I know that I would have went the other direction. (In fact, my mom would never let me color my hair. When I turned 18, not only did I color my hair ~ I picked out black. It was terrible!! I looked like Snow White! LOL) As parents, we must let our crib dreams go. We have to embrace our children as they are. Where they are. We must make new dreams with our children for our children! After all, it's about them! :) Look at things from their perspective. Imagine never being accepted just as you are by your parents. Always feeling like your not good enough because you parents want to change you. Which must mean they don't love you for who you are. It's like forcing your foot into a shoe that doesn't fit. Children are a blessing created by God. They are created just as God planned. There are no mistakes that these are the children (or child) that you are given. Their strengths, God knows and accepts. Their weaknesses, God knows and accepts. We need to love our children so unconditionally that there is never any doubt in their minds ~ They are loved.

"The child must know that he is a miracle, that since the beginning of

the world there hasn't been, and until the end of the world there

will not be, another child like him."

~ Pablo Casals

Love and Acceptance

The cousins:

Luke, Summer, Faith, Cara, Joey, and Phillip

My niece, Abby

Cara and Grandma Yarbrough

Faith, Summer, and Cara

Tonight I am once again feeling blessed. I was downloading my pictures to see what I got and just felt that warm fuzzy feeling deep inside. Must have been what the Grinch felt when his heart grew. My heart just feels full of love. I look at these pictures and think of how they have grown and changed. How their love and acceptance has changed me.

That first Christmas years ago, I remember sitting on the floor by the fireplace being quite (unusual huh? lol) Just watching trying to remember any one's names and trying to figure out who was who. My niece, Cara, was about 5 at that time. She curled up in my lap and stayed there. Aaawww...the love and acceptance of a child can make a weak person brave. I remember watching Phillip and how clearly you could see how much he loved his Uncle Brent. The love and acceptance of a child is not hid, but shines through. Now, they are in college. Starting to figure out who they are and who they want to be. Summer, she was born a couple months after my oldest, Joey. It was been wonderful to see them grow up together. They used to run and hug one another when they were little. (not so much anymore! heehee) Now, they both have turned 13 and I'm wondering where did the years go? It was harder because she was born just a few months after my own first child and I was concentrated on him. But, she has always given me a chance and her love and acceptance has made me want to be a better Aunt. Last but not least, our little Abby. She had me at her first scream! I remember getting to hold her and her crying from colic. Walking around and bouncing her a little, talking to her, then the quietness as she settled down. (no, it wasn't everytime, she did have colic...lol.) That small little joy inside knowing that somewhere deep inside of that beautiful baby, she trusted me as she curled up on my chest. (yeah, I know. She probably just fussed herself to sleep but let me have my moment! LOL) The love and acceptance from a child is humbling. They are amazing things, aren't they?

Love and Acceptance

Isn't that what we are all searching for?

To Love, Not Judge

1 John 4:12

"No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another,

God lives in us and his love is made complete in us."

I'll be honest. There are times when that is easier said than done. It is so easy to look at some one and just see what's on the outside. What they present to rest of the world. I make snap decisions based upon that. I have three kids. Is this some one I want my kids to speak to? Is this some one I feel comfortable talking with? There are so many bad things out there. So many things that I want to protect my kids and, honestly, myself from. Yet, it's my job as a parent to prepare them....

not shelter them.

Yes, there are crazy people out there. Sick people that do sick things to children and adults. As much as I'd love to hover over my children, it's not doing them any good unless I teach them about the world. Teach me kids to yell "help", not just scream if some one tries to take them. Teach them to be aware of their surroundings and each other. Teach them when to fight and when to run. Teach them about the world with all of the joys and faults it has to offer. I believe that going to public school is a great tool to prepare kids for the world. They are around children that are not like them or the other kids at church. They are exposed to different ideas that we may have never thought of. Yes, they are around kids that don't believe in God. They are around different religions that I don't believe in. Isn't that the way it is for us in the world everyday? It's our chance and our children's chance to stand on our faith. I try to teach them not to judge others, just to give other kids a chance. The Bible says to love one another ~ Even the bullies. Even the brother that doesn't call or show up. Even ones that judge you. Yes, Jesus loved all of us.

1 John 4:21

"And he has given us this command: whoever loves God must also love his brother."

Some days are easier than others... Some people are easier than others... But, if I am to teach my children not to judge others and to give people a chance, I can do no less than to lead by example. I know that I can't do it alone. And I know that I will fail at times. This is a hard comandment to follow, but I know I must try.