Tuesday, August 30, 2011

In the Spotlight



Confrontation is really hard for me. I shy away from it as much as possible actually. Yes, I know if you know how my week has gone ~ you wouldn't think so. The fact is most of the time through my younger years and especially my teen years, I let people walk all over me because confrontation scared me. I had several co-dependent relationships because of this. It is SO much easier just to let it go than to put yourself out there. What if it ruins a relationship? What if they think badly of you? What if they talk about you? What if...?

It is easier for me to help behind the scenes. To be that person people say, "thanks" to as they walk into the spotlight themselves. But, I can't always be the person that I want to be. Sometimes, I have to be the person that God wants me to be. It isn't always easy. And sometimes honestly, I wish could hide my head or put cotton in my ears to pretend it isn't my job to do something. That some one else will do the job God wants me to do.

But as I stand up for what I believe is right, I'm setting the example for my kids. That there are somethings we need to do ~ even with we don't want to. We need to speak up for people that have not found their voice. I was talking to Luke today about how he needs to speak up and tell his teachers what he needs. (this was about sitting in front so he could see the board better in science) He told me in a small voice, "that's hard for me." I know ... I understand...that is still hard for me too. Hopefully with practice, it will get easier for both of us.




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