Journey With Jen

 Today has been one month since my kidney cancer surgery.  I'm doing pretty good.  My energy is still not there and if I do too much my cut muscle will hurt.  My 12 staples going across my side has come out.  Last Thursday was the first time I sneezed in a month.  I thought that was so weird.  But with the muscle getting cut and then being sewn together -- my diaphragm would not expand enough to let me sneeze.  I would would start to sneeze, but when I tried to get the big breath, my sneeze stopped.  Our bodies are weird aren't then?   Monday I start back to work.  I'm doing half days this first week back to see how it goes.  Doctor recommended 6-8 weeks off, but I'm trying to go back part time after 4 weeks.  Since I get tired, I am sure that I'll be coming home and taking a nap with my ice pack when I get home.  However, I am looking forward to seeing the kids and adults again.  I get my daily amount of hu...

"And he came down with them and stood on  a level place, with a great crowd of his disciples  and a great multitude of people from all Judea and Jerusalem and the seacoast of  Tyre  and Sidon, who came to hear   him and to be healed of their diseases. And those who were  troubled  with unclean spirits were cured.   And all the crowd   sought to touch him, for power  came out from him and healed them all."  ~ Luke 6:17-19 ESV God, our great physician.  Our healer in times of trouble.   I still believe that God heals. It is hard to watch some one suffer.  I watched my Dad suffer from cancer.  And, go from moments of hope and joy...  To moments of despair.  To the point where the hard reality sets in.  And all those emotions in between.  The pain he had to suffer daily.  There comes a point when we realize that it is not in God'...

"This world is not my home I'm just a passin' through My treasures are laid up Somewhere beyond the blue..." Do you remember this hymn? I haven't sung it in a long time, but it's been stuck in my head lately. Maybe it is because this world is feeling more and more not home. Of course, you tend to feel more like this as trials hit closer to home. It's easier to just keep going when there isn't any bumps in the road. Lately, there have been bumps. Major bumps. I just keep thinking this will be the end of it. Surely that light at the end of the tunnel is just ahead. The fog will be melted away by the suns rays. Any of those imagery you want to insert here. :) Then, something else happens. You see ~ I am one of those boring people by nature. I have always wanted a home to have family and friends come over often. (Not the nowadays often, but the come over and play some domino's or cards on Fridays kinda' often. Were our kids are raised together.) Al...

I do know that no one said that life would be easy. It's just that sometimes ~ I do wish it was a tiny bit easier. :) Or maybe not even 'easier' is the word I'm thinking of. I think it would help me out just to even have the game plan. That the hard parts would be a bit better because I'd know what the next play was. The decisions would be a bit easier because I'd know where I'm headed. Then ~ there is real life. The walking through the mud because we didn't see the bridge down the other path. The making a wrong decision because we thought it looked right. My husband works at a factory now. He's never liked his job. They are now talking about going down to two lines. Which, with all of the layoffs they already had because of the economy, would leave him jobless. Kent is the dreamer. (just open a bakery) I'm the realist. (the hours, loans, ect) He'd love to find that awesome job. I try to be realistic with him. If you ask people, sad to say, b...

A friend of mine, her husband went to the doctor and found clogged arteries after testing. The doctor's planned to go in and put stints in if they found anything. However, when they went in it was worse than they thought and stints would not work. He is going to have to bypass two arteries going to his heart. On Yahoo News it said the John Dye, the guy from 'Touched By An Angel,' died of a heart attack at 47 years old. In the last 6 months, Gene George, Don Tyson, and Don Harp have passed away. My husband had a heart attack around 39 years old. His twin brother has had not only a heart attack but a stroke as well. There are no guarantees. Only God knows when our time is up. The young. The old. The strong and healthy. No one knows. Last year when my brother-in-law had a stroke, it was hard on everyone. His wife was scared, but trying to keep it together. My husband could see himself laying there in that hospital bed. For me ~ that was my brother laying there looking at the...

It is the start of another year. I am trying to find what it is that God wants me to be focusing on. What is it that I need to work on or bring to my family? When I think of 2009, the word Forgiveness comes to mind. It was a hard year because my Dad's cancer got worse. My mom and I talked to him everyday. We would take turns checking on him, each of us going over a few times a week. It was hard to watch him suffer. I didn't understand 'why?'. I went with him to plan his funeral. It was SO hard. But, look back, the word Forgiveness comes to mind. Dad made peace with God and received Forgiveness. I didn't know if that would ever happen, but it did. Praise God!! Also, we forgave each other in a way. I was his little girl, but I was never his 'buddy.' That was my brother. It was hard those two years when he was diagnosed because every time that I saw him, he would ask about my brother. If I talked to him. If I saw him. If my brother knew that he was sick. I wa...

I was reading the Bible and this passage was brought to my attention. It's one that I've read before. It's one that I've heard before in preaching. But ~ today, it made me go back to re-read and even to go back later. Luke 17:20-21 (NLT): One day the Pharisees said to Jesus, " When will the Kingdom of God come?" Jesus replied, "The Kingdom of God can't be detected by visible signs. You won't be able to say, "Here it is!" or "It's over there!" For the Kingdom of God is already among you. The Kingdom of God here? Among the pain and suffering? Among the jobless? Among the hungry? I have to say YES! The Kingdom of God is here among us. It lives in the hearts of His people. Wherever I go, He is there. But am I acting this way? Am I acting as Jesus would? Rom ans 12:10 (NLT) Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. I fall short of this so much. I do put others above myself alot. But, those others ar...

Halloween 2010 with Great Grandma Yarbrough Halloween 2009 with Papa Robinson When we were getting out of the van to walk to Grandma Yarbrough's and I grabbed the camera (again! LOL), Kent asked, "Why are you taking it? We won't be there that long." I thought back to last Halloween. Who knew that 12 days after this photo was taken my Dad would be gone? I didn't know this would be the last photo taken of him. If I did, the kids would have been dressed nice and hair combed. Not with green and white hair wearing a robe. But looking at the picture now, I know that it made my Dad happy to see them dressed up. He had a nerd rope for each of them that I helped him pick out the previous week. So, as I took my camera to get another picture of Grandma and the kids, I told Kent, "What if?" What if this is the last time? What if? There are no guarantees. Life is fragile. Don't take those moments for granted.

The will of God...we were talking about this during Sunday school and it got me thinking. The will of God was separated into three types: The sovereign will of God, the moral will of God, and the individual will of God. The sovereign will controls the universe. The moral will is revealed in the Bible for us to live by. The individual will ~ well, the authors' strongly disagreed with that there is one. After all, we do have free will. So, is there a plan for us here? Where does our choices and God's will touch or connect? I believe that we chose to be here. Honestly, everyone talks about going 'back home' to be with God. So, that would imply that we were once there. And God is a loving and just God. I believe that we chose to come to this earth to learn and grow and to please God. And how do we learn the lessons on this earth so we can graduate and go back home? God places people in our lives. Events in our lives. After all, how do we learn patience? It's by having ...