In the Spotlight

Confrontation is really hard for me. I shy away from it as much as possible actually. Yes, I know if you know how my week has gone ~ you wouldn't think so. The fact is most of the time through my younger years and especially my teen years, I let people walk all over me because confrontation scared me. I had several co-dependent relationships because of this. It is SO much easier just to let it go than to put yourself out there. What if it ruins a relationship? What if they think badly of you? What if they talk about you? What if...?

It is easier for me to help behind the scenes. To be that person people say, "thanks" to as they walk into the spotlight themselves. But, I can't always be the person that I want to be. Sometimes, I have to be the person that God wants me to be. It isn't always easy. And sometimes honestly, I wish could hide my head or put cotton in my ears to pretend it isn't my job to do something. That some one else will do the job God wants me to do.

But as I stand up for what I believe is right, I'm setting the example for my kids. That there are somethings we need to do ~ even with we don't want to. We need to speak up for people that have not found their voice. I was talking to Luke today about how he needs to speak up and tell his teachers what he needs. (this was about sitting in front so he could see the board better in science) He told me in a small voice, "that's hard for me." I know ... I understand...that is still hard for me too. Hopefully with practice, it will get easier for both of us.

Moving On Up...

Luke was so proud to be sitting on my hospital bed holding Faith for the first time. Who knew looking at that adorable three year old face what struggles would come? I know that I didn't... but God did. And when in the mists of this mess... God provides a message to keep going ~ keep trying ~ don't give up through our message at church on Sunday.

"Save me, O God! For the waters have
come up to my neck. I sink in deep mire,
where there is no foothold; I have come into deep waters, and the flood
sweeps over me. " Psalm 69:1-3

No, that is not the message of hope that we went over! LOL Yet, I understand this passage. I am sure that each of you have been there as well at some point in your lives. What do you do when the water is about to take you down? You look up! That is where my hope is. Sitting on my knees at the altar asking for God's help and direction through this ~ having two wonderful Christian women praying with me ~ that is God's hand. I know that He will see me through.

Another amazing lady told me recently that all of us are called and a few are chosen. And, you are chosen for this path. So, hand in hand with God, I walk along this path. I did send out those e-mails to the vice-principal and resource teacher. Luke's resource teacher messaged me back and said she didn't know about Friday. I didn't get a response today for the vice-principal, so I took myself up there. Mr.D is a wonderful guy and made the transition so much easier for Luke and I because he genuinely cares for the kids. BUT ~ he left me with the idea that he totally understood my position but there wasn't much he could do. He is going to speak to the teachers on how they speak to the kids. (don't tell them they got a lower score, when they already know the reward is for the kids who did good on the test. Seriously? That's the fix?) So, now to the next rung on the ladder. I have written an e-mail to the principal. I have also written the letter to the superintendent for K-7. I'll re-read them in the morning to double check them. (I catch a lot of errors that way!)

I realize that some might be thinking, "Really? Seriously? It's an ice cream cone!" But, it is more than that. It honestly boils down to discrimination towards the below average kids. It just tells the children that their effort and their hard work doesn't matter. (When I've been telling Luke since kindergarten how much it does matter!!) Luke was only 14 points from being average!! That's amazing accomplishment from the previous year! Yet, he knows that he is still not good enough to even get the reward. When you seperate the kids, the rest of the class/pod knows why they are not there. It's embarassing. Plus, they go into another room to do more work while their peers are outside visiting and eating. It is just plain wrong. There are many children that will never make that mark. They will never be 'average'. We need to celebrate their hard work and effort ... not the grade itself.

Thank you for all of your kind words. I appreciate your prayers. God gave me Luke for many reasons. I wouldn't be half the mom...woman...or Christian I am without him in my life.

Clueless Teacher. . .

There are times when things happen that you can just roll off. No biggy. Plus, it's a lot easier to let things just roll off when they happen to you. But, when people mess with my kids ~ that is a different thing all together.

Friday I was SO mad. If fact, the word 'mad' doesn't describe it. I was so angry that I knew I couldn't rationally call the school. All those words that don't come out of me ~ well, they were going through my head. I just wanted to sit these people down and YELL and SCREAM!! So, I didn't call at all. After several hours of trying to calm down and telling God how mad I was ~ I finally could calm down enough to compose a rational e-mail.

You might be wondering what in the world happened on Friday. (If your not wondering, you might just want to stop reading now!) Friday, we picked Luke up from middle school. I'm asking the usual questions about how his day was and what he had for lunch. The normal stuff. He then tells me that his pod (they separate the kids in middle school by pods) got to go outside and have ice cream. BUT, he didn't get to go. My first thought was it was because they had chocolate ice cream. (he's allergic) Nope that wasn't it. So, I asked if he got in trouble. Nope that wasn't it either.

Luke then proceeded to tell me that the ice cream was a reward for doing well on the Benchmark. And, they (some teacher I guess) told him that he didn't do good enough. So, Luke as well as a few other kids had to go to a language room and do extra work while the other kids went outside to have ice cream. I asked who else the other kids where. You want to know the kicker?? They were the kids in his resource language class last year!! These kids that didn't get to participate were resource kids with IEP's!! And some clueless teacher had the gawl to tell my child that he didn't do well enough on his Benchmark!

Just thinking about it makes my blood pressure go up. How dare she!! She has no idea how hard he tried. She has no idea how much progress he made on his benchmark. She has no idea what she did to my son and the other resource kids! I e-mailed Luke's assistant principal. I like to think that he has no idea about this. I gave him the benefit of the doubt. However, if I don't get a response on Monday that is satisfactory, I'll be up there. I don't make a lot of friends with assistant principals but that's okay. They come and they go in my life. But ~ that is my kid they are messing with.

Others Are Watching

We all have our struggles. Some are daily from our job or our families. Some struggles might happen spiritually or even financially. All of those struggles cause us stress and frustration. Then ~ there are those big struggles. Those moments that happen that leave us changed.

The difficulty could be anything. It might be bankruptcy. It could be a divorce. Or an autism diagnosis. Or a death. Or even cancer. Those are hard pills to swallow. Yet, all of us have been there ourselves or with a loved one. And ~ unless God calls us home ~ we will be going through it again.

And when we get that phone call ~ it is easy to ask the question, "why?" Why today Lord? Why does it happen to me or my family? Why can't everything be back to normal? Why? Why? Why?

"Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? 'Father, save me
from this hour'? But for this purpose I have come to this hour.
Father, glorify your name." Then a voice came from heaven: "I
have glorified it, and I will glorify it again." John 12:27-28

Did you read that? It is for His glory. Sometimes we go through difficulties because we need it. We have something to learn. We need to be sharpened. But, I believe, sometimes we go through things for others benefit. God knows that we can handle it because His plan is better than ours. As we go through ~ our faith and our trust standing firm and rooted ~ others can see God's glory through us. Even through our pain, we are God's light to this dark world. Others may learn to know God just from watching us. Most of the time, we'll never know who we influence. So, we must carry on as if everyone is watching.

Have you ever been inspired by some one else going through difficulties with grace? Recently, a friend's mother was diagnosed with cancer. It was in more than one spot and chemo was to start immediately. She went through six rounds of chemo. Yes, six! And although, I know there were days when she was so sick she didn't want to get out of bed ~ her faith and her humor helped her through. (as well as God's grace!) The beauty of her soul spread to those around her. It also spread several hundred miles away to me. She is cancer free today because the Lord still has plans for her life. (God can still heal!) Her acceptance and grace for God's plan is something that I'll always remember. Her faith was rooted in something deeper than found on this earth. She inspires me to be that light in whatever God puts before me. Through the difficulties, God's light can still shine.

New Beginning...

Luke (3rd), Joey (4th), & Faith (Kindergarten)
My baby girl starting Kindergarten :(

Luke (7th), Joey (8th), & Faith (4th)

Another school year has begun. It's good, right? They are growing and learning and becoming the individuals that God meant them to be. Yet, I can't help but be a little sad at it going by so fast. My oldest is in junior high and taking pre-ap classes! Geez! Luke is the only one in middles school now. Then, there is my baby...my baby is in fourth grade now. My last one in elementary school!

This year started a little different. Usually, Faith picks out her clothes the day before. (The boys you might ask ~ they never cared what they wore! I'm the one who cares if they match! LOL) She would start with her headband and earrings all the way down to the color her toes are painted. She never really dressed up for the first day. Faith would usually pick out carpis or maybe a skort ~ something she can play in! This year: t-shirt, shorts, a ponytail, and flip-flops. No touching up her nails. No fixing her hair. I think her earrings were the ones from the day before. Wow I'm not sure I'm ready for this growing up stuff! :( Ready or not... it is here.

Those little thing are just small signs of the changes to come. Joey will be 14 in October and he will be studing for his driver's license!! (I am cringing inside at the thought!!) The doctor told me when we went to get Faith's physical for camp that I needed to have that talk soon. That girls are starting earlier than they used to and I needed to have THAT talk. ReAlLy?? She is only 9. Please Lord let her stay small a little longer!

I know...I really do...the kids...they are ready to grow and find out what life is about...it's Momma. Just wanting to hang on just a little longer....wishing that it lasted just a little longer!

God's Promises

When I see a rainbow, I think of all of God's promises. I know, I know...not very original! :) Yet, it is true! We cannot have the beauty of a rainbow ~ without the storm first. It is not possible. Even in the midst of the storm, God is there in a very real way. What does God promise us?

"Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." ~ Matthew 11:28

"No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those that love him." ~ 1 Corinthians 2:9

"But whoever listens to me will dwell secure and will be at ease, without dread of disaster." ~ Proverbs 1:33

"Before they call, I will answer; while they are yet speaking I will hear." ~ Isaiah 65:24

God did not promise a life with only sunny days with puffy clouds floating in the sky. God did not promise health, nor wealth. God didn't say we'd be the popular ones with lots of friends. God didn't even promise that we wouldn't suffer. Somethings are just a part of life on this side of heaven.

But God did promise to be the friend we can rely on. God has promised to prepare a place just for you and me. There is no reason to fear or dread because it is all under God's control. God promised to listen...and not just listen, but to answer. That where ever we find ourselves, God is there. He can hear our faintest cries. He knows our hearts. He knows where we have been and he knows where we are going. AND ~ He is there with us through it all.

Our Passion

Our Pastor raised the question. . .

What are you passionate about?

Your kids? Your family?
What hobbies are you passionate about?
Painting, reading, sewing, photography, or maybe knitting?
So many things in this world to become passionate about.

Do you have any passion left for Christ? Do you live daily for Him? Not just on Sunday mornings, but each and everyday? In the dictionary, passion is defined as a "powerful or compelling emotion or feeling." Does that describe your walk with Christ? Do you want to read more? Pray more? Draw closer to Him?

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your mind
and all your strength." ~ Mark 12:30

To love the Lord with everything. Not just the pices of us that is left after a busy day. That is a tall order. After all, in this life, we are busy, right? We go to work most of the day. Then, we have to take the kids to football or soccer. We have to squeeze in supper somewhere too. By the time we get home and help the kids with homework ~ we just want to take a hot shower and go to bed! I know, I totally understand!

Our passion is not just sitting aside time to pray and to mediate. (although that is part of it) Our passion for Christ is throughout the day. It is those small examples that our kids notice. It is kindness to a stranger. Or going out of our way to help some one else. Our passion should be living with a higher purpose, knowing that God has it under control. It is talking with God throughout the day, not just before bed.

"You God, are my God, earnestly I seek you;
I thirst for you my whole being longs for you,
in a dry and parched land where there is no water."
Psalm 63:1-3

Isn't that beautiful? In a world filled with sin and pain and suffering, to have a longing for Christ. To have a passion for God. There is nothing here on this earth that can fill that void. You can fish all day. You can paint or sew until your eyes are blurring and your fingers hurt. Those passions are fleeting and do not fill that void we are searching for. Only one thing can fill that void inside each of us: Christ. He should be our passion. He deserves nothing less than our best.

“The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.” ~ Mitch Albom

It's Not About Us

"God does not exist to make a big deal out of us. We exist
to make a big deal out of Him. It's not about you. It's
not about me. It's all about Him." ~ Max Lucado

Isn't the Milky Way beautiful? When you look at that picture of our little galaxy, you cannot pick you our little home: earth. And if we cannot see earth, we cannot see North America and the states we call home. Did you realize that there are estimated 100 to 200 billion galaxies in the Universe? We are so small in what God has created. So very small.


Yet, we can look at the ocean and feel close to God. Or walk through nature and see all that God has created. Or hold a newborn baby. God is there, yes. But, God is also found in each of us. We are here to give light. . . give love. . . show God through us. To give God glory. And to me honestly ~ that sounded really weird to me for years. I mean, I realize why we would want to give praise and glory but why does God want the glory? He doesn't need it. God is love. He has no ego. Why does God want the glory through our lives?


Then, I found an answer that made sense to me. Look around us. There are so many people struggling. So many people lost and looking for answers out there. We are to be their light! Yes, us ~ imperfect and struggling ourselves ~ we are to be their lifeboat in the middle of a storm. We are here for God's glory so that we can guide others to Christ. Our life to be to be some one's candle so the glory of God can be carried on.

God love us for some reason. He has created the universe, yet He walks with us. He cares for us. We are so special to Him, that He knows our names. Yet, through our walk in life, our purpose is for people not to remember us ~ but to know God. We can the their lifeboat in their storm. We can show them God's love. That is our goal. Our purpose. To give glory to our Creator because, after all, it is not about us. It is about Him.

Joy of Creating

Love Sunflowers!
Simple A-Line Dress

What To Do With Halloween Material?
Cut It Up And Sew It Together! These Are Kinda'
Match-y For Faith And Abby

Still More Material? Make A Ruffle Skirt Too!
This Is Faith's Favorite And I Used One Of
The Boy's Old T-Shirts For The Base! :)

Thursday I realized that my alone time was almost at the end and I hadn't even dug out my sewing machine! I even got two new patterns at Hobby Lobby when they were half price. I realize that when it says "simple" ~ it might be simple, but I am need a sewing for dummies pattern before I can follow it!! :( So, I dug out some of Faith's clothes so I could figure out length and widths I could use and tried it free-hand. I had one dress that didn't fit. Pretty good odds considering I have no idea what I'm doing!

Can you tell that I have some Halloween material?? LOL Yeah, I still have some left too. I have two tubs of different material that I have collected through the past couple years. And, some my mom has found for me. (Hence, the Halloween material!) There is a second hand store that would have fabric remnants and she would get yards and yards for $3-4 bucks. Of course, none of my kids have ever wanted a shirt of orange spiderwebs or cats, so that material just sat there. Until I was looking through Faith's clothes and found a skirt that inspired the ones I made. I even had enough to make my niece, Abby, a skirt kinda' like Faith's. (you can find the waist measurement of different sizes online to know how much elastic!)

Now, that my projects are finished for now, it is time to put my stuff back up. :( I don't think that I will wait so long before I dig everything out again. I enjoy it. Now, though, that cleaning list I was supposed to get done last week?? It actually has to happen this week. After all, school starts next week and the kids will be tired and cranky .... maybe even mommy too! ;~D

Camp Week

Last Sunday, after church, we dropped the kids off at camp. This is their first year. They were a bit nervous. Mommy was a bit nervous. Joey went to band camp earlier this summer, but that was only one kid-o. This time I was leaving all three of them. It is a christian camp that has been around a while and several of the kids at church go every year. So, I wasn't too worried about their safety.

Besides, they send you a link to the pictures they download everyday. For instance, today they put up over 450 pictures! So, I have spent several hours just going through all of the pictures they put on there just to tag my kid-o's and see what their doing. You can put them in a favorites folder and order them at the end of the week. Out of all of those photos, there has only been one photo of Luke taken with his cabin on the first day. I have been so worried. Just asking for one picture of my boy! Just one! Finally, today, Luke's pictures was the last one in a group of photos: #307. I'm thinking, maybe I should have asked for two?! :~D

But, what was Mommy going to do with a week without children?? Seriously, it has never happened!! Never! It's been several years since they all three spent the night at one of their grandparent's house. That's about it. I went to lunch with a friend and we got to catch up over Chinese. Yum!! I stayed up until 2am several nights, then didn't get up until 9am. (I love to read!) Here's something amazing! I did three days worth of laundry in one load!! ;) Miracle! Tonight, I got the sewing machine out. I made Faith two dresses and one longer shirt for Capri/ stretchy pants. Pictures will come after she's here to try them on and I can be sure they look okay! LOL

So, really ~ that to do list I was going to get done. All that cleaning I was going to do. Well, it still needs to be done! :) It was an eat fruit loops at 10 am kinda week. A week of just not doing a whole lot and being just fine with that. Next Friday is our all day meeting before school starts. There is just not very many days of summer left. Cleaning will have to wait until another day!

The Idea of Contentment. . .

Contentment is something that we all struggle with. It is something that I struggle with. There is so many things out there in this world. So many places that I have never seen. So many things that I have never done. It is sometimes hard to look around at what I've done, who I am, where I am and say ~ it is enough.

When ever my mind starts drifting in that direction, I remind myself that there is a real reason that I am here. Something that doesn't have to do with the stuff of this world. Something bigger than me.

"Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in

whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought

low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I

have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance

and need. I can do all things through Christ which

strengthens me." ~ Philippians 4:11-13

Yet, still being of the flesh, I must remind myself of this. For my husband, it is even harder. I see him struggle with this. For a man, those toys ~ that stuff ~ seems to go with being a man. As kids we used to say (and now our children say!): "but all the other kids have it!" It still effects us as adults as well. Sad but somethings don't change!

Unless we do! We have the power to make that change. No, I may not ever fly to Italy or see Australia. What I can change ~ and what you can change ~ is our minds and our hearts. Right here and right now is where God has put me. I am thankful that He didn't put me in the renaissance area!! Way too many layers of clothes plus corsets! ewww!! Can you imagine wearing those when it's 100 degrees out?? Okay, where was I? God put me in here in Arkansas for a reason. A number of reasons or else I would have moved by now. God's plan for me ~ and for you ~ where ever you are and what every circumstances you find yourself in. God is there with you.

Just knowing that I am not going through this alone. Knowing that God has a plan. Knowing that God is in control. That is where contentment is found. Inside yourself where God dwells. We must stop looking around and looking outside ourselves for something that was always inside us to begin with.

And the Winner Is. . .

Woo-hoo!! Congratulations to Darla Anderson! Thank you to everyone who entered. I hope that you guys enjoy your desserts as much as I enjoy making them for you! There will another contest soon....maybe pie? Or cinnamon rolls? Or scones? We will have to see! For now, I'm going to dig out my carrot cake recipe, start shredding some carrots, and make a run to the store for cream cheese (for frosting). Delish! Have a wonderful Wednesday my friends.

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their

labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity

anyone who falls and has no one to help them up."
~ Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Kids Are Not Born A Brat

Have you hear about some restaurants banning children? I know ~ it sounds a bit severe, doesn't it? But, think of some the kids your children go to school with. . . maybe even neighbors. . . and, sad to say, even kids in your own church. Geez!! Once my kids are grown and I don't have to put up with them, would I want to?? It's not the ones that have had a hard life or being raised by single parents most of the the time. It's kids with both parents and no discipline.

Yeah, I said the big "D" word!! DISCIPLINE!! So many parents, let their kids get away with everything. There is no respect towards their parents, so (of course!) there isn't any respect towards other adults. Many of the teenagers today are carrying around IPhones. They are driving around cars that we as a family could not afford. They do not understand what it means to work towards something. To value the gifts they have been given. The children (and some adults) are in a "me, me, me" society. Just like that child in the picture. I see it. I want it. If I cry, some one will give it to me. (F.Y.I. You cannot buy their love.)

Parents, we are not here to be their best friends. That is not the role God has given us. As much as my kids are open and honest with me, I know that I don't know everything that goes on and all their feelings. And, as much as I would like to, I really shouldn't. I want that open communication that I didn't have growing up but I also have to realize that I'm their parent, not their B.F.F. That is what their friends and/or cousins are for. Or maybe another adult, like an aunt or uncle. Our role as parents, according to God's word is to guide and yes, to discipline our children. As children grow and become adults, that respect for their parents and other adults will still be there.

"Whoever spares the rod, hates their children, but the one who

loves their children is careful to discipline them." ~ Proverbs 13:24

"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on,

however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those

who have been trained by it." ~ Hebrews 12:11

"A rod and a reprimand impart wisdom, but a child left undisciplined
disgraces it's mother." ~ Proverbs 29:15

"Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with

the rod, they will not die. Punish them with the rod and save them from death." ~ Proverbs 23:13-14

Maybe I'm getting old...okay, be quite... yes, I know I'm getting old, but that is not the point!! :) I notice the lack of respect for others so much more today. Children seem not to care when an adult tells them to do something. Remember when walking on a sidewalk and adult came by and you got over to let them pass?? Yesterday, Kent and I had to move over for a group of teenagers. It is so pathetic really. Kids were sitting on the track at the Jones Center while we were trying to walk and wouldn't move even after Kent metioned that this is a track for walking.

Chilren feel so entitiled today. Kids are not born brats. They are born a blank slate with their own little personality quirks that God has given them. Yet, they learn not only from example, but from what you enforce in your home. If they can get away with it, they will. (just like us, huh?) It is us, as parents, to set boundries. Not because we want our kids under our thumbs, but because we love them. Just as God does with us. Next time your out with a large group, watch your children. See how they interact with not only other children, but with adults. Make sure they are showing respect towards adults and concern with the smaller kids. Don't let your kids be the ones other parents don't want to be around.

.