Waiting on the Lord

"I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in His word I hope;

my soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen for the

morning, more than watchmen for the morning." Psalm 130:5-6
"I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lordin the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong,and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord."Psalm 27: 13-14
 

Yes, God knows who to get His point across. The first Pslam has stuck with me since the weekend. Then, what happens? Oh yes, Wednesday night Bible study brings about the second verse. Okay! Okay!! I know, I know...W A I T. Waiting is sometimes the hardest thing to do.

I am just ready to have some movement. We have been living in our temporary homes for a couple years now. We've downsized until we cannot downsize anymore. We've learned that things do not matter as long as we're together. We've learned that we are a lot stronger than what we thought. All through the grace of God and prayers of good friends.

Since February, we've been looking for a home. It drives me crazy not being able to have people over! I love sharing a meal with friends and family. I'd have people over all the time if I had a home to welcome them in. I've ALWAYS wanted to have Thanksgiving at my home with family running around. We are being very budget minded and a home in the foreclosure or short sale status is where we can get a good buy. It's been a long half of the year. We've put offers on a few. Dealt with some shady Realtors. Found homes we love. And yet, at this point...we are still waiting in this little hole with paneling and bugs. YUCK!

A friend of mine is waiting as well. We are in this together, although for different reasons. She is struggling with starting a family. My heart aches just thinking of all she is going through. I know that only the great Physician knows all of the answers and hears our prayers on her behalf. I have to believe that God's plan includes children with snotty noses, yelling "momma" is in her future. But, for now, we are both...

Waiting...I know the Lord's plan is so much better than mine. I know the Lord knows my heart even better than I. But right now, at this moment, I want to ask, "When, Lord? How much longer do I need to wait?" I know there are bigger problems out there. I know the needs are many. But, right now, that four-letter-word creeps in my mind constantly. When?? For now though, I must wait knowing that God hears and knows better than I.

God's Beauty

We went for a hike today. To be in the midst of God's Beauty is a
wonderful thing! I look everywhere and see the flowers showing
us God's glory!  It is beautiful!
 

Let everything that has breath praise the Lord
Psalm 150:6

A blush of pink...

Snowflakes in the middle of spring...

Sunshine in the petals of flowers...

A Weed full of Wishes! :)

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is
to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone
with the heavens, nature and God.

Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and
that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple
beauty of nature. I firmly believe that nature brings solace
in all troubles. - Anne Frank 

God's Freedom

“For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only

do not use your freedom as an opportunity for

the flesh, but through love serve one another.”

Galatians 5:13 ESV

This freedom that God has given us can be difficult.  We question everything.  We doubt and falter on our journey.  It's very easy to get sidetracked in this world.  So many things that can occupy our time and thoughts.  It's difficult to just be still and listen...without the mind wondering to that 'to-do' list waiting for you or listening to the kids or planning dinner...or...or... you get the point! :)

But, this freedom is so important.  God did not create us without free will.  As much as God loves us, He holds us with an open palm.  We are free to walk away...to wonder off.  Parenting skills that we should all listen to.  It is very hard for me to do as a parent.  I want to protect my children.  To close my hand so nothing can hurt them.  I've learned as I've grown as a parent, that is not possible.  Things, not always good, will get through and touch my kids...change them.  That's where my Faith steps in.  Because although they maybe out of my sight, they are never out of God's.

Freedom to choose how we are going to live.  Freedom to believe.  It gets difficult to understand in our human minds that God is all knowing yet we still have free will.  Psychology in college even had us debate this!  But God is warning us not to waste this freedom.  Don't take to much time debating and discussing this.  Just use it.  Use this freedom to serve others.  Use this freedom to spread His word, not just with your voices, but with your actions.

Month of Service: May

Some of the youth of Phillips Chapel FWBC

There's my daughter in the middle, Faith (red shirt)

There's Luke in the red shirt

There is Joey, red shirt (yes, I made my kids matchy-ies! LOL)

 

Wow, we are on our 5th month of service already!  I think that's wonderful.  We have really enjoyed it.  It's great to step out of our day to day and get involved with things bigger than you.  This month, I got with Darla from our church and we got the youth involved.  Darla is the lady that has been involved in a few of our month of service events.  She is great at stepping up and helping!  This time, we headed to one of our local nursing homes.   There we sang a few songs and then performed a puppet routine for the elderly. Several came up to us while we were putting things away and told how much they enjoyed it.  

In just a few days, we will be out of school.  Woo-hoo!!  I am looking forward to serving with the Salvation Army and other organizations during the summer.  They only serve lunch so the only time we can only do this is during the summer.  What a great outreach to be a part of!  I can't wait to see where God will use us over the next few months.     

Role Reversal

Time does seem to fly.  I get busy.  Work.  Husband.  Kids.  Laundry.  Bills.  Yes, yes...that list gets longer and longer.  Then, one day, you take a moment to really look around.  And what do you see? 

Our parents are getting older.  Which makes sense because well...got some gray going on myself!  But, it just seems so unreal at times.  My mother's skin is getting thinner and she bruises easily.  Sometimes she looks so frail. 

My Dad passed away in 2009 from cancer.  I remember going to all of the doctor's appointments.  I filled out the paperwork and spoke with the doctors.  Just as I do for my own children.  My Dad, which would look at any contract before I signed it when I younger, now needed my help with his rental agreement each year. 

I've know in my head that roles get reversed as your parents age.  For me, it's hard to realize that it's really happening.  I'm not just reading about it.  I'm living it!  I would really rather live in denial a little longer.  :)  just being honest!  It's hard to be the authority figure in your family.  To have both generations looking for guidance.  It's a lot sometimes!  Who can I look to because I don't know it all?  Who can I cling to?  Who will protect me and comfort me?  I know ...that's a lot of me's and a lot of whinning!!


The person I look to for guidance is always there day or night.  He knows my heart.  To be honest, I'm not that strong.  I'm not that wise.  I've shed tears of selfishness because of the 'why me's??"  And, said several times, "I'm not ready."  But, God is strong and wise.  Through Him, I have the grace to make it another day.  Only with Him, can I be the daughter and mother that I am supposed to be.

"O God, from my youth you have taught me,
and I still proclaim your wondrous deeds.
So even to old age and gray hairs,
O God, do not forsake me,
until I proclaim your might to another generation,
your power to all those to come.
Your righteousness, O God,
reaches the high heavens."

Psalm 71:17-19

Spring Pictures

It's been almost two years since I did my children's pictures.  Our lives have felt like a roller coaster going up and down.  I'm ready to get off the coaster and just stroll! :)  Enjoy the blossoms along the path.  With Mother's Day coming up, I knew it was a good time to get my kids to cooperate for an hour.  To get pictures of all three of them together takes some cooperation and patience! And plenty of retakes! Just thought I'd share pictures of my three blessings. 

Joey (14), Luke (13), & Faith (10)

My tuba player, Joseph (Joey)

My "baby" girl, Faith

My middle son, Luke

Dispensers...not Containers :)

"Walk in wisdom toward  
outsiders, making the best
 use of the time. Let your speech

 always be gracious, seasoned
with salt,  so that you may 
know  how you  ought

 to answer each person."
Colossians 4:5-6

It is time to be involved.  Don't just shake your head and say 'Amen' on Sunday.  Be involved on the movement of Christ.  As my pastor says, be dispensers not containers.  Isn't that a great way to put it?  Don't just take everything you learn and not share it.  Feed your soul with good and righteous things ~ then go and feed others.

The first part of that is SO important.  We must feed our souls.  We must listen, read, study, and learn.  If there is a service, then you should be there.  Not just a warm body...but an open soul ready to receive!  Open up your Bible besides on Sunday and Wednesday.   Music ~ singing praises to our Lord!  Let it fill you heart and spirit.  Take it all in!

Only then, can we truly feed others.  How can we give out, what we don't already have?  We can make the difference in some one's life.  You and I.  Isn't that amazing?  We might be the person God wants to use to reach some one today.  Are we going to listen?  We must live on purpose.  We must live by example and walk in wisdom for those around us. 

That includes our family members, not just strangers.  Those Sunday morning's when nothing is going right and we are in a hurry ~ our attitude effects the family.  If we don't act like we are excited about going to church, do you think our kids will be?  If we don't give them a little push now and then to get them involved with other kids at church, do you think they will want to go?    The most important people we must live intentionally for is our family.

Oh, I never explained that picture, did I?  I've been using my gift of baking to make these yummy baskets for the visitors of our church.  Just another way to reach out to others.  It is wonderful to be a part of something larger than myself.  It's time to be involved...to be dispensers of the Word. To show the Love of Christ by WHAT we do.

Waiting Once Again...

I'm ready for a stroll in the park.  The breeze cooling me off.  The smell of honeysuckle in the air.  Squirrels chasing each other.  Birds making beautiful music.  Sounds wonderful, doesn't it?  Unfortunately, Life doesn't work that way.

Life's road is so uncertain. The paths are unclear. The destination is unknown.  There are steep inclines where we huff-and-puff, putting one step in front of the other. It's hard work, but no one said it would be easy.  I am thankful for God which guides my steps and the prayers of faithful friends.

Kent's heart cath was done last week.  And, there wasn't any new blockages.  Most would read that and be thankful and relieved.  I just couldn't.  I cried.  I just want my husband fixed.  Is that so bad?  He often has pressure on his chest when he lays down and can't get comfortable.  He couldn't even walk down the street with my daughter and I with the dog.  (I'm not a speed racer...I'm the, o' look there's a squirrel and look at that pretty flower)  How can that doctor tell me that there is not a problem??  Of course, now that the doctor has told him this ~ everything is fine.  I'm making too big of deal over it.  I'm being dramatic.  But, I know different.  So hard to convince a man!

I am not sure where the next step is.  I am just waiting right now.  I am waiting to see what God puts in front of us...where He guides our steps. 

God, Our Healer

"And he came down with them
and stood on a level place, with
a great crowd of his disciples
 and a great multitude of people
from all Judea and Jerusalem
and the seacoast of Tyre
 and Sidon, who came to hear
 him and to be healed of their
diseases. And those who were
 troubled with unclean spirits
were cured.  And all the crowd  
sought to touch him, for power
 came out from him and healed
them all." ~ Luke 6:17-19 ESV

God, our great physician.  Our healer in times of trouble.
  I still believe that God heals.

It is hard to watch some one suffer.  I watched my Dad suffer from cancer.  And, go from moments of hope and joy...  To moments of despair.  To the point where the hard reality sets in.  And all those emotions in between.  The pain he had to suffer daily.  There comes a point when we realize that it is not in God's plan to heal his sick body.  But, to take him away from the pain.  God's healing does not always include healing these physical bodies.  We just have to be ready to accept God's plan knowing that it's for the best.

I am there once again.  Asking for God's healing.  For years, I have asked for God to heal Kent's broken body.  Through the years, we have gotten temporary fixes...more medication...more stints.  I've watched his health get worse.  I've seen my husband that was always outside doing something get more and more tired.  It's hard on him... and me...and the kids.  Tomorrow, Kent goes in for another heart cath in the afternoon.  My prayer is for healing.

My prayer to our Great Physician:

Lord, I ask for his healing.  Your will, not my own.  Whether his broken body can be fixed or not ~ I just want him healed.  I want him to feel better.  To feel like himself.  To be able to run again.   Lord, You are my husband's healer.  You are our strength.  With You, anything is possible.  Please be with the doctors tomorrow.  Be with my husband tomorrow.  Lord, fill him with a peace and comfort that only You can provide.  I thank You for all that You will do.  In Jesus Name, Amen.