Question of Sanity

At this moment in my life, I have two teenage boys.  Both will be going to junior high next month.  Both are about to drive me crazy.  I try to remember a sweeter day.  When they were younger...pulling each other's hair...fighting over hot wheels...watching Bob the Builder together.  Those days when they would be mad at each other for a moment and laying beside each other watching Robin Hood the next.  I loved my summers with them.  Doing arts and crafts.  Cooking in the kitchen.  Even doing classwork during the summer. 

Aren't they cute?  I couldn't find one of when they were really small on the computer, but they were even cuter.  :)  Then, they had to grow up.  Seriously.  Those that willing get up in the morning and go to a school that has teenagers ~ must be clinical.   I remember the junior high age as being kind of rough for a girl.  Now I know what the mother's go through.  I think it's worse!!  I want the terrible two's again!!! 

I know that teenagers are hard for everyone.  But honestly ~ when you have one with a disability ~ it multiplies it.  All they see is how their brother gets away with things that they can't.  The big picture, the empathy, all that disappears.  All of a sudden, it is back to the terrible two's saying, "it's not fair!"  You know what?  It's not fair!  It's not fair that Luke has to try twice or three times as hard at school than everyone else.  It's not fair that kids won't give him a chance and he doesn't have friends.  It's not fair that Luke can't express his emotions like everyone else.  There's a lot of things that is not fair.  I will step down from my soap box.  I am just tired tonight and hearing a perfectly capable person whine about things not fair again.  I know seeing the big picture is hard.  I just want him to get it...to see it.  A lot to ask when many times I can't see the picture either.  Being the mother of two teenagers is the hardest thing thus far.

For those mothers reading this and who had gone through this already....bless you!  For those with little ones or pre-teens...your time is coming!  For me right now....I am just going to pray for God to help me through this since killing is against His commandments! And, the scary part is that my daughter is just a few years behind my boys.  I can do this!  I can do this!

"Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life; you stretch

out your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and your right hand

delivers me. The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love,

O Lord, endures forever" Psalm 138:7-8

All of us have a purpose to fulfill.  I know that moments likes these are part of mine.  God will walk us through them all with a loving hand.